Recognizing National Hispanic Heritage Month

Written By: Vivian Valles, NFNL Youth Case Manager

National Hispanic Heritage Month is a very joyous and celebratory time for individuals of Latino/Hispanic ethnic origins. Originating in the U.S. in 1968, it was first recognized as a week-long celebration under President Lyndon Johnson then became a month-long holiday during Ronald Reagan’s Presidency term in 1988. This was a time for allowing recognition of the Latino culture such as the food, music, dances, artwork, clothing, traditions, and more! This holiday is celebrated by hosting festivals, art shows, conferences, and community gatherings to speak more about what traditions are sacred and valued within this ethnic population. Some of the most honored traditions include “Las Posadas”, which is to remember the story of Mary, Joseph, and the birth of Jesus, “La Quinceanera” where a young girl celebrates her 15th birthday and becoming a young woman, and “Dia de los Muertos”, where family members who have passed on can be remembered and honored. September also recognizes the Independence Day for Costa Rica, El Salvador, Guatemala, Honduras, and Nicaragua on September 15th, Mexico on September 16th, and Chile on September 18th.”

Growing up in this culture has really made an impact into the person that I am today, the values I hold near and dear to my heart, as well as the way I view raising my own future children. Even though this holiday is only celebrated one month nationally, it is lived every day through me and the rest of the Latino/Hispanic individuals nationwide. I am extremely proud to be able to call myself a Latin American woman.

Since working here at New Friends New Life, where we have added more bilingual staff members such as myself throughout the years, there has been a significant increase in the number of Hispanic individuals we serve. 75% of the teen girls we serve in the Youth Resource Center are Black or Hispanic/Latina. In the cultural aspect of the Hispanic community, it is not uncommon for the daughters of Hispanic homes to take on more responsibility in the household such as chores and assisting with raising of their other siblings. This can then progress into beginning to act and think more like an adult instead of having the mindset of a young teenage girl.

With the resources we have to offer both the youth girls and their families we have been able to provide psychoeducation and caregiver support in learning more about their family systems, attachment styles, and how to integrate these learned techniques to adhere to a more positive and healthy relationship for the entire family. We as an agency have learned that to transform the lives of the teen girls, we must also serve their caregivers. Since implementing these new strategies in case management, group therapy, and individual therapy, I have seen a significant change in the way this has positively influenced the girls and their families in how they interact and begin to understand one another. My hope is that we at New Friends New Life will continue to serve more Latino/Hispanic individuals and help them create better futures for themselves despite the barriers that they often face.

The Social Intersection of Disabilities and Sex Trafficking

Written By: Katrina Tamez, NFNL Grants Manager

Prior to working at New Friends New Life (NFNL), I had the opportunity to work with individuals with intellectual, developmental, and physical disabilities. This adventure was one of the most rewarding and educational experiences I have ever had. They are beautiful, talented, loving people who made a profound impact on my life. Little did I know that experience immeasurably prepared me for the work I do now with NFNL.

Society often labels those with disabilities as incompetent, less human, incapable, or even dumb. As a result, they often experience discrimination and prejudice as well as receive lower quality education, services, and care. However, one of the most devastating outcomes is the increased likelihood of becoming a victim of sex trafficking.

The societal intersection of persons with disabilities and sex trafficking is protrusive. Texas has consecutively ranked in the bottom two, 49th overall, for supporting individuals with disabilities. Texas also ranks second nationally for trafficking prevalence with more than 313,000 statewide victims of sex trafficking each year. Here at NFNL, in a 2021 survey, approximately 35% of our survivor’s report having needed special education/accommodation when they were younger and 20% are currently receiving disability services. Let that sink in for a moment.

Multiple studies suggest sex trafficking is experienced at heightened rates by those with intellectual and physical disabilities (Reid et al., 2018; Franchino-Olsen et al., 2020; Martin et al., 2021). A study reviewing sex-trafficking case-records discovered that nearly one-third of the victims had an intellectual disability (Reid, 2016). Any vulnerable person can be at risk for human trafficking, however individuals with a disability face an increased risk for several reasons:

1.  Traffickers may seek out victims to gain access to public benefits such as Social Security Income.

2.  Individuals with disabilities often become submissive to caregivers and comply with their wishes. The caregiver could take advantage of this dependency and force prostitution. Forty-one percent of child sex trafficking involves a close member or relative of the child as the perpetrator (The Counter-Trafficking Data Collaborative, 2022).

3. Many educators and caretakers do not consider individuals with disabilities as sexual human beings. This can be detrimental because it results in a lack of sex education or education on safety within relationships. As a result, people with disabilities often do not know what constitutes sexual abuse and what is consent. (Reid et al., 2018).

4. People with disabilities may be isolated and discriminated against. Because of this, they crave friendships and relationships. Traffickers may also target these individuals by pretending to be a boyfriend or someone that will provide love and attention. Individuals with disabilities may not understand the difference between a trafficker, a sex buyer, a friend, or a boyfriend/girlfriend (Reid et al., 2018).

5. Individuals with disabilities also are more likely to live below the poverty line (Seevrie et. al, 2019). Ninety four percent of new NFNL members report earning less than $25,000 annually, living 70% below HUD’s 2021 median income levels for Dallas. One ploy that many traffickers initially use is the lure of being able to provide shelter, care, financial assistance and more.

The average age an American girl is trafficked is between 13 and 15 years old. Imagine a young, naïve pre-teen who has not received the care, attention, and education needed to know that a trafficker is grooming them.

People with disabilities are capable of amazing things. For example, KiloMarie Granda Ph.D., an individual with multiple disabilities who is also a sex trafficking survivor, is the founder and CEO of Unspoken Voices, an organization that advocates for survivor voices. Additionally, many of our NFNL Alumni are thriving in their personal and professional lives! Despite centuries of oppression, imprisonment, and abuse; despite negative stigmas, victimization, and discrimination, individuals with disabilities are rising stars, ready to accomplish new heights.

At New Friends New Life, we are dedicated to prevention and early intervention at our Youth Resource Center as well as restoring and empowering in our Women’s Program. NFNL addresses the problem of sex trafficking in Dallas by stepping in to ensure survivors of trafficking and exploitation have the tangible, mental, and economic tools necessary to escape the sex trade for good, as well as advocating for policy change and education to bring awareness to trafficking and aid prevention efforts.

Reparation of our society cannot happen without collaboration and teamwork. If you were looking for a sign to get involved, this is it. Volunteer. Donate. Spread awareness. Do not sit back any longer.

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Reference List:

Ancor Foundation. (2019, January 10). Texas Ranks 49th Among All States in Efforts to Serve Individuals with Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities . The Case for Inclusion. Retrieved July 20, 2022, from https://caseforinclusion.org/

FAMILY MEMBERS ARE INVOLVED IN NEARLY HALF OF CHILD TRAFFICKING CASES. The Counter-Trafficking Data Collaborative (CTDC). (2022, January). Retrieved July 19, 2022, from https://www.ctdatacollaborative.org/

Franchino-Olsen, H., Chesworth, B., Boyle, C., Fraga Rizo, C., Martin, S., Jordan, B., Macy, R., & Stevens, L. (2020). Minor sex trafficking of girls with disabilities. International Journal of Human Rights in Healthcare. 97-108. https://doi.org/10.1108/ijhrh-072019-0055 

Martin, L., Rider, G. N., Johnston-Goodstar, K., Menanteau, B., Palmer, C., & McMorris, B. J. (2021). Prevalence of trading sex among high school students in Minnesota: demographics, relevant adverse experiences, and health-related statuses. The Journal of Adolescent Health. 68(5), 1011–1013. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jadohealth.2020.08.021

National Hotline 2020 Texas State Report. National Human Trafficking Hotline. (2021, July 1). Retrieved July 20, 2022, from https://humantraffickinghotline.org/state/texas

Nichols, A., & Heil, E. (2022). Human trafficking of people with a disability: An analysis of state and federal cases. Dignity: A Journal of Analysis of Exploitation and Violence, 7(1). https://doi.org/10.23860/dignity.2022.07.01.01

Polaris. (2019, December 3). Individuals with disabilities may face increased risk of human trafficking. Polaris. Retrieved July 19, 2022, from https://polarisproject.org/blog/2018/08/individuals-with-disabilities-may-face-increased-risk-of-human-trafficking/#:~:text=Any%20vulnerable%20person%20is%20at,with%20disabilities%20to%20being%20trafficked

Reid, J. A. (2016). Sex trafficking of girls with intellectual disabilities: An exploratory mixed methods study. Sexual Abuse: A Journal of Research and Treatment. https://orcid.org/10.1177/1079063216630981

Reid, J.A., Strauss, J., & Haskell, R. (2018). Clinical Practice with Commercially Sexually Exploited Girls with Intellectual Disabilities. In Social Work Practice with Survivors of Sex Trafficking and Commercial Sexual Exploitation. Nichols, A., Edmond, T., & Heil, E. (Eds.). New York, NY: Columbia University Press. p. 218-238.

Seervie, S., Shah, A., & Shah, T. (2019, April 16). The challenges of living with a disability in America, and how serious illness can add to them. Commonwealth Fund. Retrieved July 19, 2022, from https://www.commonwealthfund.org/publications/fund-reports/2019/apr/challenges-living-disability-america-and-how-serious-illness-can

US Department of Housing and Urban Development. (2022, June 15). CDBG income limits. HUD Exchange. Retrieved July 19, 2022, from https://www.hudexchange.info/resource/5334/cdbg-income-limits/

The Many Hats We Wear: Our Reason to Go Above and Beyond

Written By: Avery Hammer, NFNL Receptionist and Intake Coordinator

The women we serve at New Friends New Life (NFNL) have faced innumerable and unthinkable trials and tribulations throughout their lives. Many have endured repeated, complex traumas since they were young girls and only now are being given a space to grow and care for themselves. These women are intelligent, brave, generous, resilient, and stronger than anyone else you will ever meet. More importantly, they are deserving of a chance to pursue the life they want to live. As our receptionist and intake coordinator, I have the privilege of being the first person many of our members speak to from the agency. I get to form a relationship with each of these incredible women and am permitted a view into their lived experiences. They are the reason I look forward to coming to work every day.

Our agency’s main priority is always member safety, and that safety comes in many forms. The women we work with have rarely (if ever) had a safe place to call their own. To allow for personal growth, physical safety is deemed fundamental. We closely monitor every person who enters our building, only allowing people into the office once we see their faces in our security camera, guiding visitors to their respective meetings, and monitoring maintenance workers and security officers who come on site. All of our volunteers are trained on the topic of trafficking before they can interact with our women or youth. These extra considerations allow for our members to feel safe taking a nap on our couch when they can’t sleep at home and let them know that this is a place where they can let their guard down and be themselves.

Once everyone feels safe in a space that is designated as their own, emotional safety makes a demand for attention. Our members deserve to have non-transactional relationships that reinforce their own self-worth. We quickly become listening ears to stories that have never been shared and models of healthy relationships as we abide by boundaries they learn to set. Everyone employed at New Friends New Life wants to see our members succeed and strives to provide an environment where they are comfortable, feeling vulnerable and open to personal growth. By having welcoming and understanding staff, our members learn that we are here for them and that they no longer need to fight on their own.

Here at NFNL, we walk alongside our members at a pace that they set. Their choices are paramount to their personal empowerment journey, and they control the direction of their path. This makes a significant difference in so many lives, but the work does not and cannot stop there. We must advocate for change in every aspect of our society. Public perception, policy, ignorance, and demand for sexually exploitative services are all obstacles in the fight against sex trafficking. Our team makes community partnerships for resources, presents at conferences, and speaks out during city council meetings. We attend individual court cases and give news interviews. We work with the police to kickstart their outreach programs and we offer trainings to organizations like Southwest Airlines to help airport personnel spot trafficking victims. We advocate because these are steps that must be taken to protect future women from enduring what our members have endured.

       Our team provides therapy, helps find jobs, sorts through available resources, and strives to help pave the way for the life our members have always desired. We also push for policy change and public awareness, but the true beauty of our program shines through our members. After processing traumas that they may have perceived as their fault and appropriately assigned responsibility elsewhere, our members thrive.  They buckle down and realize that they have always deserved better and that the hand they were dealt was not of their own doing. This is their space; we just happen to work here. They don’t need us, they have survived their whole lives without us, but they allow us to help. They allow us to be a part of their growth, and at graduation, they show us that they are the most powerful and inspirational women we have been lucky enough to know.

What Every Parent Needs to Know About Child Sex Trafficking

Written By: Susan McKelvy, LPC-S, NFNL National Conference Director

Before joining the team at New Friends New Life (NFNL), I knew a little about trafficking. I had been through some trainings, and I came from a background of trauma focused clinical work, so I was familiar with how our experiences can impact our mental health. I certainly thought I knew more about trafficking than I really did. But since coming to work at NFNL, I’ve learned so much about the myths of trafficking. Particularly, I’ve come to understand that my fears as a parent were more about the myths surrounding the subject, and less focused on the reality of how youth get trafficked.

Many of us have seen the Hollywood movies that show a child or teenager being kidnapped off the playground or from the mall before being trafficked. But in reality, only 10% of trafficking victims are kidnapped. Many trafficked youth are recruited, coerced, or approached by people they already know. And a common myth is that trafficking is something that happens elsewhere, in other countries. But approximately 15,000 to 50,000 women and children in the United States are forced into sexual slavery each year. And the trafficking of minors is a growing problem. In 2020, of the more than 26,500 endangered runaways reported to the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children, one in six were likely victims of child sex trafficking.

Commercial Sexual Exploitation of Children (CSEC) refers to a “range of crimes and activities involving the sexual abuse or exploitation of a child for the financial benefit of any person or in exchange for anything of value (including monetary and non-monetary benefits) given or received by any person.”

As the parent of a soon to be teenager, I’ve become so much more aware of the need for educating our youth in the areas that are most likely to impact their safety, as well as providing a healthy support system. This would include involving community stakeholders to reach more of our youth, such as schools, youth programs, Child Protective Services, and law enforcement. We also need to recognize the high-risk factors for CSEC, including:

1.     Economic and social disadvantage

2.     Abuse or neglect

3.     Homelessness

4.     Involvement in the child welfare system

5.     Substance use

6.     Mental health concerns

7.     Identifying as LGBTQ

Knowing the risk factors, understanding the difference between the myths and facts in trafficking, and understanding how to create a safe space for our youth is paramount to changing the odds. This includes youth programming like New Friends New Life has that provides a trauma-informed approach to case management, mental health services, and a safe drop-in space. It also means providing education to the community, involving survivors in the messaging, and providing resources to parents and families. As parents, we have tools at our fingertips as well! These can include:

1.  Spending time with your kids. Get to know their friends, their teachers, and the community where they spend their time.

2.     Open up the conversation! Building a trusting relationship with your child allows them to feel safe talking to you about their own experiences and what they are seeing and hearing around them.

3.     Talk about online safety. Our children are exposed to more of this world more quickly than ever through constant access to technology and social media. Teaching our children about online safety is key!

4.      Recognize any changes in behaviors or the people your children spend time with.

 As a parent myself, I want to create an open line of communication with my children, and I need to make sure they know I’m a person that they can talk to about their experiences and interactions in the world. As a community, we can help raise awareness and bring change together.

Forgiving a Father

Written By: Annette Bailey, NFNL Economic Empowerment Specialist

This month is dedicated to celebrating Fathers all around the world. Many of us come from broken or dysfunctional homes where the father is not very much celebrated due to the verbal, physical, sexual, or emotional abuse that was inside or outside the home. As a survivor, how many of us can express or even celebrate this prestigious moment of our fathers’ lives? Not many. As a survivor many of us have nothing but sad and unspoken memories of the father who may have sexually, physically, verbally, or emotionally abused them. For some, life’s precious moments were taken away by someone who was supposed to be their protector, guardian, a gentle and stable person whose desire is to be grounded and do their best.

Cultures have different messages about what it means to be a man, a husband, and a father as the provider; meaning “real men bring home the bacon and support their families.” The disciplinarian father must be safe and respectful today in this role; meaning no verbal, physical or emotional abuse. This brings me to my understanding of the role of a father. “Fathers, like mothers, are pillars in the development of a child's emotional well-being. Children look to their fathers to lay down the rules and enforce them. They also look to their fathers to provide a feeling of security, both physically and emotionally.” I am a survivor of sexual exploitation. My abuse came from my father who was verbally abusive towards me. As a child, I did have all the things mentioned about my father, but after I turned 16, my father told me that I was not his child and at that moment, my whole world turned upside down.

My mother and father were married for 57 years, and I knew that he was my father. Why would he tell me at age 16 that I was not his child? It’s mind-boggling right! Years have passed and much therapy was needed to forget the marks and stains of the words spoken from my father. So, if you have it in your heart to continue to live on and live free from the bondage of a father’s abusive behavior, FORGIVE and let go. Some years ago, I lost the man I grew up knowing as my father. But before his passing I was able to give comfort and support to the man who verbally and emotionally abused me as a young teen girl because of forgiveness.

Not all fathers fit inside this category. Maybe you were raised with a father who showed you all the characteristics of what a father should be like. To all fathers near and far around the world--raising children can be a difficult task.  Here are two thoughts I submit for your consideration if you want to be in the category of a loving father:

Prepare yourself as much as possible before starting a family, and LOVE your child/children unconditionally.

To Fathers all around the world, Happy Father’s Day!

Calling All Men…Will You #StandForHer?

Written By: Matt Osborne, NFNL MAG Liaison

“No no, Señor Osborne…those are just prostitutes and table dancers!”

I was stunned to hear that sentence come out of the mouth of the highest-ranking law enforcement officer in Spain, with whom I was meeting as part of a diplomatic assignment for the U.S. Government in the capital of Madrid. For a minute I had to review in my head the Spanish vocabulary I had learned years earlier to confirm that I correctly understood him, but those were his exact words.

Preventing, Prosecuting, and Protecting

The year was 2007, and I had been tasked to write the entry on Spain for the Trafficking in Persons (TIP) Report that the U.S. Department of State puts out each year to grade countries on the “three P’s” of fighting human trafficking...how that country is faring in: Preventing trafficking, Prosecuting traffickers, and Protecting victims.  As a junior Foreign Service Officer on my first overseas tour, I was intimidated to say the least to have to sit across from Spain’s most powerful law enforcement officer and inform him in my pure gringo Spanish that his country had a trafficking problem. He initially misunderstood me, either due to the fact that my Spanish was shaky or more likely because he was willingly turning a blind eye to the issue of commercial sexual exploitation in his country. He replied that the “traffic” in Madrid was indeed a problem due to poorly timed stoplights and pervasive potholes.  He suggested that the summer months were better when many in the capital head to Spain’s numerous beaches and vehicle traffic subsides, and suggested I come back to see him then. It was only after I showed him on a map of Madrid a few locations that our intelligence had identified as hotbeds of human trafficking—a truck stop where young African girls were sold by the half hour, a table dance bar featuring women brought over from Eastern Europe on false pretenses, and an Asian massage parlor and nail salon exploiting women and girls from China and Vietnam—that he responded with the sentence that began this article, casually dismissing the human trafficking victims being forced to work in those locations as, “just prostitutes and table dancers.”

Victims, Not Volunteers

Fast forward 15 years and I am pleased to see how much progress has been made in the fight to raise awareness about the global problem of human trafficking and child exploitation, as more and more people around the world have come to realize that this is trafficking, not prostitution, and that these women are victims, not volunteers. I am also grateful to see that in recent years Spain has achieved and maintained Tier 1 status in the Trafficking in Persons Report, indicating that its government fully complies with the minimum standards of the Victims of Trafficking and Violence Protection Act of 2000.

Since my first exposure to this issue back in 2007, I have had the opportunity to play a small but myriad role in the fight against child exploitation and human trafficking—first as a US Government intelligence officer and diplomat, and later with an anti-trafficking NGO that empowers law enforcement in the U.S. and around the world to launch undercover sting operations to arrest suspected traffickers, free trafficking victims where appropriate, and help provide aftercare and counseling services to survivors.  More recently, I have been blessed to be affiliated with New Friends New Life (NFNL) in Dallas and have come to see that one issue stands above all in its importance to truly ending this crime once and for all…and that is the issue of demand reduction among men and the shifting of societal norms around the purchasing of commercial sex.

I have become convinced that it is vital for men to take a prominent role in the fight to end child exploitation and human trafficking, because too many men in our society share the view that trafficking victims are “just prostitutes and table dancers.”  I speak from experience because, much to my chagrin and embarrassment, I had those same thoughts in my adolescence and early adulthood. And, before I was exposed to this issue through the writing of the TIP Report, I had assumed that the women I saw working the streets or in strip clubs or on online escort sites were there of their own free will and choice.  I made the erroneous assumption that this was just like the movie “Pretty Woman,” where it was made to seem as if the Julia Roberts character truly had the choice to decide when, where and how she performed sex acts for money.  But I soon came to understand that today it is the extremely rare occurrence, if indeed it even still happens, where a woman has total control over how she runs her business and where she keeps one hundred percent of the profits without a pimp or trafficker controlling her body and earnings.  The hard truth is that the vast majority of women in the commercial sex industry are not there of their own accord, and most likely are being abused and exploited in some of the worst ways possible.  It is imperative for all men to understand this reality.

Addressing Demand

Though steady progress has been made in educating men about this issue, it is still an uphill battle and there is much more work that needs to be done to raise awareness.  To that end…I am so grateful for the Men’s Advocacy Group (MAG)—an auxiliary of NFNL created to mobilize men to take action against sex trafficking and exploitation of women and girls by raising awareness through advocacy, education and volunteerism. The more than 100 DFW-area men who have supported our group in recent years know that we have the power to effect real change, because while men drive the demand, we can also influence fellow men and our youth.

MAG members support the mission of NFNL through various volunteer opportunities:

• Teaching The manKINDness Project curriculum in high schools, churches and Young Men’s Service Leagues.

• Sponsoring and leading the Sex Trafficking Awareness Excursions (bus tours) that raise awareness about sex trafficking in and around Dallas.

• Serving or providing meals for NFNL members

We call on all good men to join our rallying cry to #StandForHer…we promise you will not regret the decision to join our group of uncommon men who not only refuse to be part of the problem, but who mobilize to be the solution to the epidemic of sex trafficking in the DFW area.

Join the fight!